Baby :)

1. Project Manager is a person who thinks nine women can deliver a
baby in one month.

2. Construction Manager is one who thinks single woman can deliver
nine babies in one month.

3. Controls Manager is one who asks if the baby is in the budget
(and if it saves money to adopt).

4. Project Engineer is a person who thinks he can deliver a baby
even if no man and woman are available.

5. Section Engineer is a person who thinks it will take 18 months to
deliver a baby.

6. Client is the one who doesn't know why he wants a baby.

7. Engineering are still figuring out how to produce a baby.

8. Contracts and Procurement buys condoms by mistake.

9. Planning Team think they don't need a man or woman; they'll
produce a child with zero resources.

10.DCC Team thinks they don't care whether the child is delivered,
they'll just document 9 months.

11.Quality Auditor is the person who is never happy with the
Process to produce a baby.

12.Site Engineers don't care... they just want the woman.

13.HSE Team think... why condom not been worn properly or if baby
born why without helmet, safety glasses, overall, safety pull-on
boots
and earth plugs!!!

VHF conversation - USA vs Canada - Ler så jeg griner

This is the transcript of the ACTUAL VHF radio conversation of a U.S.
naval ship with the Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland
October 1995.

Radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval Operations 10-10-95.

Canadians: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid
a collision.

Americans: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the North.

Canadians: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to
the South to avoid a collision.

Americans: This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert
YOUR course.

Canadians: No. I say again, you divert YOUR course.

Americans: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS LINCOLN. THE SECOND
LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES ATLANTIC FLEET. WE ARE ACCOMPANIED
BY THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS, AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS. I
DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH, I SAY AGAIN,
THAT'S ONE FIVE DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTERMEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN
TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP.

Canadians: We are a lighthouse. Your call.

 

 

aldrig

Har du 
noen gang
tenkt på
hvor enkelt
det er
å ødelegge
alt?

det som
alltid 
var aldri
vil aldri
bli alltid
igjen

 

 

hvorfor
det ble sånn
er det
ingen
som forstår
før det er
for sent